Ryan Reynolds' 'Daily Routine' Is Both More And Less Mad Than Mark Wahlberg's

Mark Wahlberg's 'daily routine' reveal suggested that he's roughly the same as that kid at school who told everyone he had a PS3, and a Wii that he got from Japan, and an Xbox 360 four months before release, and went to see 50 Cent and went backstage because his dad knows his manager from work and you weren't even there so how would you even know anyway?

The half-hour game of golf and the 11am 'family time' slot conveniently scheduled for when everyone else is out of the house were works of subtle genius already, but if you give Ryan Reynolds a shout on his Aviation Gin business email ([email protected]aviationgin.com) you'll see the Deadpool actor's two-footed lunge on Wahlberg's semi-nocturnal ab-centric lifestyle.

Lovely stuff. 'Celebrity child kennel' has echoes of Alan Partridge's Youth-Hostelling With Chris Eubank doesn't it? Get some famous children and some children of famous people, chuck them in Battersea Cats and Dogs Home, see what happens. Might be an idea to get some adult children of famous people—Sean Lennon, maybe—to make sure things don't get too Lord of the Flies.

This story originally appeared on Esquire.co.uk. Minor edits have been made by the Esquiremag.ph editors.