Truly Rich Techie Problems: The Truly Rich Lady’s Close Encounters with GIFs, and More
I think the use of Instagram Stories is a clear indicator of where one lies in the generational divide. If you use them, you are a young person. If you are confused by them, you are an old person.
I know what are you thinking: “Who is this Truly Old Rich Person to say what is the technological barometer of age when, just a year ago, she did not know how to do the Facebook and the Instagram?”
Well, my dear troll, I have learned all about these popular social media sites. Thanks to my many assistants and also the Google, I now know how to like, post, and share, give a thumbs up or down, and also how to compose a tweet, which is not the sound birds make but a message about your very important feelings, so please don’t @ me.
You know who else knows all about technology or, at least, pretends to know it? My Truly Rich Mother, who sent me this message via e-mail:
Her caption reads: “When the chef serves you an expensive dish called Ocean Memories and you realize it is fish with foam.”
I thought her e-mail was hacked or worse her phone, an iPhone 7, was stolen. I rushed into her room and I found her, as usual, sitting up her bed, scrolling through god knows what on her phone.
When asked about the strange e-mail, she said this: “Si-si, you don’t know how to use a GIF? Are you okay?”
I can not believe I have been outsmarted by a woman who once complained that she could not hear her incoming phone calls and then found out, with my help, that her ringer was on silent for two days
I thought I knew it all. I had just learned how to do Instagram Stories! I sent a message to my Intern via WhatsApp and told her to prepare a presentation about the GIFs.
To all my Truly Rich Friends, who are of a certain age, this is for you.
What is a GIF?
A GIF, as used in popular culture, is a short moving clip used on the Internet. To be exact, as per Merriam-Webster, it is a computer file format for the compression and storage of visual digital information. It is also short for Graphics Interchange Format. I am sure you have come across one on your feed.
Wait, how do you say it?
Is it a hard G, as in “gif,” or soft G, as in “jif”? Its creator, Steve Wilhite, ruled in 2013 that it is the latter. But President Barack Obama proclaimed in 2014 that he prefers the hard G. As for me, the Truly Rich Lady, I prefer the soft G because it reminds me of the peanut butter.
When is it best to send a GIF?
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so when you want to send a message and do it in the most economical way, as in make the receiver understand what exactly you are feeling right away, send a GIF.
It is a great way to start a conversation or end a conversation. In other words, GIFS are best suited for making a point.
For example, when my Just Rich Friend Jennicka said in our Viber group that the Duchesses of Cambridge and Sussex must hate each other because she read it on the Internet, I simply sent this:
No need to explain.
How do I choose a GIF?
You can ask a young person to choose for you. If a young person is not available (they are probably busy crying about their feelings), consult giphy.com or other GIF repositories. The portal lets you key in your emotion or sentiment or mood and then presents a plethora of options.
As an experiment, I opted to send GIFs instead of my usual missives, which are perfectly constructed messages with proper spelling and punctuation, all of last week. I think it went well. Here are examples:
When my paramour asked who ate the last slice of cake:
When my Truly Rich Friends made a pointed joke about my habit of not attending parties:
“This is me entering the room. See you.”
When my Truly Rich Friends ask for my ETA as I am a little behind:
“I am just accessorizing in my car. 5 mins.”
When Mother asks if I had a good time last night:
And when Mother reminds me to settle down and find a good man instead of gallivanting all over town:
Can I be a GIF myself?
Why, yes. In fact, a lot of regular people have become GIFs simply by the strength of their bold expressions. I am partial to faces as GIFs, as naturally they express the intricacies of human feelings. If you want to be a meme, I suggest you record your face while emoting very hard. Anything can be GIF, but the best ones just happen. Take a look at this ordinary person who has become a viral GIF:
Aren’t these GIFs a corruption of proper communication?
While I have written about the sacredness of language, I have now come to the conclusion that it, along with grammar and communication, is a living thing that evolves with the times.
Tell me: Do you still speak as if you are the unica hija of a haciendero from the turn of the century? If so, please venture into the world and expose yourself to the people of the now. This year, the words, “malitpoo,” “peoplekind,” and “situatedness,” have been added to the Oxford English Dictionary.
On the streets, from the mouths of the youth, comes the word, “suh,” which is the combination of “sup” (what’s up) and “huh” (confusion). Then, there are memes, which are little nuggets of popular culture that are also used for communication.
I don’t know how to use “suh” or memes just yet—memes are more advanced and something I will need to research on more—but I will try to them out because I know we live in the real world and not on the pages of a grammar book.
So, if you think that GIFs are a detriment to expression, well then: