Fashion

15 Things No Man Should Have in His Wardrobe

Planning a clear-out? Best start with these.
Comments

Statement Shirt

As a general rule, if it's popular amongst the presenters of Top Gear (or The Grand Tour, post Clarkson-gate), it's probably best avoided. Never is this truer than in the field of the "show-stopper" shirt, beloved of men who want to come across as the risk-taking eccentric at the family barbecue. Wearing one of these is definitely a risk.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Two-tone / Panelled Shirt

As a second general rule, if it's popular amongst the presenters of Match of the Day, particularly Alan Shearer, heed the warning signs.

Pointy Shoes

There once was a terrible battle between normal, nice round-ended shoes and the evil pointy, winkelpicker variety that are uncomfortable and seem to have been modeled on the wardrobes of medieval serfs. Sadly, it seems, in large parts of Britain, the pointy shoes won. The effects can be seen on High Streets up and down the land to this day.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Gym-branded Rucksack

Nothing screams "Yes, I've pretty much given up" more to your fellow commuters than this world-weary freebie draped over one shoulder.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Cargo Trousers

When you're embarking on a five-day trek through Snowdonia, it's probably useful to have trousers with 17 pockets of varying depths and multi-zip functionality. In a pub in Wandsworth, however, you look like an arse.

Band T-Shirt

Everyone likes music. But feeling the need to tell the world what music you really really like (look!) through the medium of your clothing is best left behind at Fresher's Week.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Beaded Jewelry

It's irritating, but excusable, on an 18-year-old just back from Koh Tao. But on a 32-year-old Account Manager from Letchworth? If you're trying for edgy and interesting, you're hitting slightly creepy.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Bootcut Jeans

There was a time in the late Nineties, when bootcut jeans were everywhere. That was 15 years ago. To be wearing them now with your rear hem frayed and dragging through puddles is borderline sociopathic.

Football Leisurewear

Football shirts are one thing, but the 'leisure' range of spin-off polos and fleeces for lounging about the house in? Somehow much, much worse.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Comedy Tie

Ties aren't, and never will be, funny. Even the subtlest attempt to bend this law will backfire spectacularly.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Those Too-tight Trousers

You bought them in the sale. Once you got back in the gym routine, you told yourself, they'd fit like a glove. When you wear them you walk like John Wayne during the hemorrhoid years. The charity shop is calling.

Going Out Shirt

Probably black, probably got a wobbly second button and probably faded around the collar because you've been wearing it since 2003. Mix it up a little.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

The 'Casual' Waistcoat

So hard to pull off, they should come with a warning notice. Wearers are most likely to be mistaken for a tinker, tailor or recently divorced University lecturer.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

Pleather Jacket

If leather jackets are a minefield, their low-quality imitation equivalents are an unrestricted warzone.

White Jeans

Are you anItalian power-boat racer, having dinner in Portofino during a mid-August heatwave? Then you'd better take them off.

ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW

This story originally appeared on Esquire.com.

* Minor edits have been made by the Esquiremag.ph editors.

Comments
View More Articles About:
About The Author
Will Hersey
View Other Articles From Will
Comments
Latest Feed
 
Share
A Chinese vessel rammed into a Filipino fishing boat, and then abandoned its 22 fishermen in their sinking boat at sea.
 
Share
The track-inspired collecton drops June 27.
 
Share
Your favorite wrestling superstars will beat each other up in the Philippines in September.
 
Share
The personalized and superior construction of custom-made shoes equal better wear and very happy feet.
 
Share
In 1992 the Pearl Jam frontman connected with a woman after his concert. Last week he found her again.
 
Share
From thick to thin, New York to Neapolitan, stuffed crust to Hawaiian, the options for the best pizza in Manila are aplenty.
 
Share
Facts about our National Hero that may have been overlooked in the teaching of history in classrooms.
 
Share
This idea has upset Piers Morgan for some reason.
 
Share
The Shazam! star made a splash in some great looks for his biggest-ever night as master of ceremonies.
 
Share
Google celebrates the 158th birth anniversary of Philippine National Hero Jose Rizal with a Doodle.
Load More Articles