This Fresco of a God-Sized Penis Proves Even the Romans Were Obsessed With Big Dick Energy
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The restored La Casa dei Vettii (House of Vettii) in Pompeii has been unveiled to the public after 20 years of refurbishment, and while the residence is opulent, it’s the erotic frescoes that caught our attention. Particularly the panel featuring a man with a baseball bat for a penis.
The said man is actually Priapus, the Greek god of animal and vegetable fertility known for his, ah, sexual potency. He was the son of Dionysus, the god of wine, and Aphrodite, the god of love. From gluttony and passion was born the most well-endowed god in the Green pantheon.
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In the panel, Priapus is weighing his god-sized phallus on a scale loaded with money—a reflection of the homeowners’ humongous wealth. Priapus’ giant penis was also thought to ward off evil. How, exactly, is unclear, but it’s certainly large enough to be used as a sword.
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Located in the House of Vettii, the panel is one of the many frescoes that decorate the historic home that was owned by former slaves. Aulus Vettius Restitutus and Aulus Vettius Conviva were freedmen who are believed to have constructed the home in the second century BC. After breaking their bonds, they became rich wine merchants, and their shared home is a testament to their immense wealth.
“They [the owners] evidently tried to show their new status also through culture and through Greek mythological paintings,” said Gabriel Zuchtriegel, Director of the Archaeological Park of Pompeii, to the Associated Press."'It's all about saying, 'We've made it and so we are part of this elite' of the Roman world.'”
Despite escaping slavery, Aulus Vettius Restitutus and Aulus Vettius Conviva aided slavery once they earned their wealth. They participated in the flesh trade and even had a room in their residence converted into a small brothel.
Like all homes in Pompeii, the house was partially destroyed by the volcanic ash of Mount Vesuvius’ eruption in 79AD, but after careful restoration, the Archaeological Park of Pompeii reopened the residence to the public. Now anyone can appreciate the well-endowed greeter of the House of Vettii, as well as the other erotic frescoes and statues that promise a titillating home tour.
Pompeii is a long way from the Philippines, so for now, we can satisfy our curiosity with these closeups of the restored House of Vettii and its stimulating frescoes.
Watch The House of Vettii's restoration process below.
